Unfortunately, dating sites and apps allow people to have secret interactions and flirtations and, in some cases, entire relationships without the risk of their partners catching them in the act. Fortunately, these sites aren't necessarily as anonymous as would be adulterers and cheaters would like to believe.
If you suspect your signifigant other might be using a dating site or app, there are a few ways to confirm your suspicions, including through starting your own infidelity investigation. You'll need to check their phone for common dating apps, conduct a Google search using personal details like their email address and, if necesary, create test accounts on popular apps and sites to see if your signifigant other is returned as a potential match. If all else fails, you can hire a professional investigator to find out for certain whether your signifigant other is using a dating site.
Here's how to go about your search:
1. Check browsing history on shared devices
The first step is to be aware of common dating sites and apps (many of which are intended to look inconspicuous) so that if you stumble upon them on a shared devices's apps or browsing history, you’ll recognize them. (Do not attempt to access a device belonging to someone else without their permission. Generally speaking this is illegal, and has even led to jail time in the past. Evidence of infidelity can and should be found in other ways.)
Popular affair websites include:
Dating sites are also common avenues for infidelity.
Popular dating sites include:
Of course, over 50% of internet usage takes place on mobile devices, and dating apps are now extremely common.
Affair-specific apps include
Dating apps, like dating sites, are mainly used by single people - but sometimes people in comitted relationships will use them to look for romantic entaglements on the side.
Popular dating apps include:
If you see an app name you don’t recognize, Google it to see if it’s intended as a dating or cheating app. For dating sites, it can be a little more complicated. You can always scan through emails to see if any raise a red flag (for example, Match.com), as these websites typically send a welcome email and occasional updates.
Remember, there are clear legal restrictions on what you can and can't do when it comes to accessing or tracking someone's phone. Make sure you're aware of them before you do anything that might get you into trouble with the law.
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2. Search for their profile images and email address
To find them online, run a search on google for their email address, phone numbers, full name, and profile picture. It's possible one of their profiles could show up in the search results.
To search for their profile picture, save their social media profile pictures (and any other likely candidates for dating profile pictures) and drag them one by one into the google images search bar. If your spouse is using one of these photos for an online dating profile, you may see it show up iin the search results.
3. Create test profiles on likely sites
They could also be using information you simply wouldn’t know. In that case, an option is to create your own account on one of these sites and then search for their physical attributes (age, hair color, etc) and location to see if you find a matching profile.
Many sites and apps (like Tinder) only allow people to see each other based on location and mutually matching search criteria (like age and sex). To search these sites, you may need to alter your profile to match your sigifigant other's potential search preferences.
You can also scan your credit card statements, as many sites charge an activation fee for new profiles.
4. Don't try electronic surveillance options - often they aren't legal
Flexispy and others have been involved in a scandal involving hacked user accounts and potentially illegal or unethical surveillance.
5. Use a professional investigator
Ultimately, if you’re worried that your significant other is on a dating site, there are many options for sleuthing (ranging from a quick scan through emails and browser history to more intensive—and expensive—actions). If nothing else works (or you don't have the time to conduct an exhaustive search that may or may not be conclusive), consider hiring a private invesitgator.
Spoiler alert - we can help you with that! We can quickly and professionally get you answers to any of your questions - just schedule a free consultation to speak with a case advisor.